Tag Archives: humor

Lighten’ Up ! Kids at Church

This  is from my Sister in The Lord, Marie !!

Enjoy !!

  • 3-year-old Reese :
    ‘Our Father, Who does art in heaven,
    Harold is His name.
    Amen.’
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  • A little boy was overheard praying:
    ‘Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it.
    I’m having a real good time like I am.’
  • After the christening of his baby brother in church,
    Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.
    His father asked him three times what was wrong.
    Finally, the boy replied,
    ‘That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home,
    and I wanted to stay with you guys.
  • A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they
    were on the way to church service,
    ‘And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?’
    One bright little girl replied,
    ‘Because people are sleeping
  • A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3.
    The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.
    Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
    ‘If Jesus were sitting here, He would say,
    ‘Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.’
    Kevin turned to his younger brother and said,
    ‘Ryan, you be Jesus!’
  • A  father was at the beach with his children
    when the four-year-old son ran up to him,
    grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore
    where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
    ‘Daddy, what happened to him?’ the son asked.
    ‘He died and went to Heaven,’ the Dad replied
    The boy thought a moment and then said,
    ‘Did God throw him back down?’  

A wife invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said,
‘Would you like to say the blessing?’
‘I wouldn’t know what to say,’ the girl replied.
‘Just say what you hear Mommy say,’ the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said,
‘Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?’

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Filed under apologetics, Apostles, church, evangelical, family, God, Holidays, Jesus Christ, Love, religion, Spirit of God

Economic Bailout Plan that WILL work !

I would like to take credit for this brilliant plan, BUT, nevertheless, I give credit where credit is due.
I heard this gentleman jokingly make this remark on Foxnews the other night, and it was so fantasticly simple, that it seemed rediculous.
Based on the US Census site here is what I came up with ;
“Thank you, America, for your participation in Census 2000.
The population of the U.S. on April 1, 2000 was 281,421,906 [PDF 2M].”

The man said that if the US Government was to send everybody $1 million dollars, Americans could pay off their bad debt and really stimulate the economy!
It would only cost $281,421,906.00 and that is a WHOLE LOT LESS than $700 billion. WOW!!!!!!!!!

I guarantee I could pay off my debt with a lot less than a million dollars and then I could really stimulate the economy with the left overs. I believe that I would also be able to grow The Kingdom with that kind of help!
What was that,” the wealth of the wicked, laid up for the just ??”
HMMMMM!!!! Sounds like a good plan to me !
What do think ?
BTW, thanks Dennis Miller, for your insight !!

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Filed under Christianity, family, religion